Sportscasters and numerous pundits have offered numerous responses to the suspension of NFL Ray Rice following the release of a video purportedly showing a violent interaction with his girlfriend (now wife). Suspicions abound as to whether the league was aware of the video and chose not to react in light of the criticism it received earlier in the summer over Rice’s two-game suspension for what the shorter video revealed. Is it enough for the NFL to just penalize him, or should the league do more? While some criticism of the NFL is warranted, it seems that additional attention should be paid to the actions of the saga’s central character; which belonged to Ray and Janay Rice.
What is clear in this case is a really public depiction of something that is commonly played out in private. Domestic violence tends to have a sadly predictable script. Usually an abuser seeks forgiveness for his actions, which is then granted by his victim in the hope that the abuse will stop. No. In fact, it typically increases over time as the cycle continues. Often the result of escalation is intervention by law enforcement, but even so, victims tend to change their minds and withdraw charges or refuse to press charges altogether. In the most extreme cases, victims end up in hospital or, even worse, die. Sadly, the pattern itself is self-defeating with tragic results that can often be avoided if the pattern is broken enough by the perpetrator, the perpetrator, or both.
This pattern is not only statistical supported; appears to be somewhat precisely rendered in the Ray Rice scenario. After the release of the partial video and a two-game suspension by the NFL, Rice appeared genuinely sorry for his actions and fans were willing to give him the benefit of the doubt, hoping this was an isolated incident. Even his wife, by marrying him (the abuse occurred while she was still his fiancé), was showing the forgiveness generally granted to the perpetrator by the victim. Even after a longer video was released and her husband was fired by her team and subsequently suspended by the NFL, she kept at it defend him. Violent altercations like these are barely isolated incidents, and the continued support of his wife shows that as Ray Rice’s domestic violence problem is far from resolved, action by the NFL can’t be contained.
Unlike many cases of domestic violence, this one was caught on video and the individual involved is a widely known figure. More than 60 percent of incidents of domestic violence occur At home where they’re less likely to be captured on video. Most are never reported. Domestic violence is widespread. One out of each four women will experience some form of domestic violence in their lifetime. Domestic violence also knows no socio-economic barriers. This is not a black, white, rich, poor, gay, straight, Republican or Democrat issue. This is a human problem.
A case can be made that Ray and Janay Rice had a special opportunity to get the help they needed exactly because their case was so public. At the same time, many celebrities fall into the trap of trying to portray their life as better than it truly is. There is still hope for Ray Rice, not as a professional footballer (that ship has sailed), but assistance is available to aid his violent outbursts if he so desires. Likewise, assistance is available for Janay, but she must overcome her denial first.
Their need for help received little attention in the media frenzy around them. Amid criticism of the NFL’s actions, the focus has been on what the league did to punish Ray Rice, as if punishment was enough. Has anyone asked what if any action the NFL is taking to give help for him and his wife? If anything, just suspending him, irrespective of how quickly and decisively the league acts, means nothing if Ray Rice (alleged perpetrator) and Janay Rice (alleged victim) never get the help they need to overcome the challenge before them.
Help is available for victims of domestic violence.
National Domestic Violence Hotline: (800) 799-7233; National Sexual Harassment Hotline: (800) 656-4673; National Teen Dating Abuse Hotline: (866) 331-9474.
